Yes.

[ he watches kind of dispassionately but he does grip the tumbler when he's directed to. he feels far off, thinking about how he lost her the first time and how it turned out. all because he was selfish and petty and cruel. ]

I've wondered who it was for eighty years and now this.

[ he takes a drink, a long one, and doesn't stop until his tumbler is empty. then he rests it on his knee, not looking at trevor for a long time. when he finally does, at least he's focused. it's better than this vague staring he's been doing.

he's always been so ambivalent about them as his enemies. lackadaisical. but now the hatred and anger boil under his skin, buried under the numb feeling of loss sitting like ice on him. ]

I wish I'd made them suffer.

[ more than he did: he'd been on such a time crunch, had to work so fast. but if only he'd been able to torture them all. ]

She never did anything wrong. It's my fault this happened to her.